Make GigSalad better, upgrade your browser!
You are using an outdated browser. Please upgrade your browser in order for GigSalad to operate properly.
We recommend that you use Google Chrome or Mozilla Firefox.
Marty Simpson

Marty Simpson

8 reviews

About Marty Simpson

"The continuous roar of laughter let us know Marty was a pro of the highest caliber…"
-- Ron Hoppe -- Lake Norman Baptist Church



Wonderful Addition to Non-Profit Fundraiser

By Celita H. on October 23, 2014

On October 20, 2014, AMIkids hosted the first annual Night of Laughter to raise money for our non-profit’s work in South Carolina. Marty Simpson graciously agreed to be one of our comedians, as we wanted to feature home-grown talent and comedians who would respect the nature of our non-profit and provide clean, yet still adult, comedy. Marty came through on this mission with rave reviews! Not only was he hysterical, but he was mindful of his audience and provided us with a set of comedy that any adult would appreciate, but did not rely on vulgarities for punch lines. We received wonderful feedback from our event- which included adults of all ages, races, and backgrounds- and Marty was instrumental in making that happen. I would highly recommend Marty for any type of comedic event. His professionalism and talent made him a delight to work with, and he kept our audience entertained from start to finish.

Hired as: Stand-Up Comedian

THE BEST clean comedian EVER!

By Betty S. on July 24, 2014

Marty Simpson is without a doubt the funniest clean comedian I have ever heard. His DVD IS WORTH EVEY PENNY! Fun for the whole family to watch!! He nails it with the humor in everyday life experiences of which he has had in several different areas of varying careers. He teases and jokes about the things he loves most which entertains the audience even more! Book him and buy his DVD for a night of ONE hour family fun. Then you'll watch again, I promise!

Hired as: Christian Comedian


By Ron on February 28, 2014

Marty was a huge help in making our Valentine’s Dinner event a great success! I don’t know how often you hear professionalism and comedian in the same sentence but your willingness and ability to deliver a show perfectly suited to our crowd, and a continuous roar of laughter clearly demonstrated you are a professional of the highest caliber.

Given the opportunity, everyone involved in planning our event would not hesitate to recommend you to any other church group needing a good laugh … or any other group for that matter.

Marty Blew Us Away!

By Dennis M. on January 25, 2012

Marty recently did our “After Christmas End-of-First-Semester” school faculty and staff party. I had never met Marty, nor had I ever heard him do his routine. I had only read a short “essay” he had written for a local news agency. After meeting him for just a few minutes, one of my event coordinators asked, “Is he going to be funny?” I told him, “If his routine is anywhere near as funny as the conversation we have had for the last few minutes, we are going to love him.” He did not disappoint from the first moment to the last.

Teachers, just like any profession, need an opportunity to relax, let their hair down and enjoy a good laugh. Marty gave us even more than that! My faculty and staff are still talking about him on our campus weeks after the event. His experiences as a teacher and coach, a college football player, a dad, and otherwise, are portrayed wonderfully and are well-suited for any audience. And, it cannot be stressed enough that he was able to perform for an hour with hilarious material that would be appropriate in language and content for any audience. And it did not feel like an hour, at all!

I wholeheartedly recommend Marty to be a part of any organizational event. You will not regret even one minute of the time that you spend with him. He is great! His performance exceeded my hopes and expectations, and I am sure that it will exceed yours, as well.

Hired as: Christian Comedian, Comedian, Comedy Show, Corporate Comedian, Stand-Up Comedian

Response from Marty Simpson:


Thank you so much for having me at your McBee High school End of the Semester party. I always love performing for school teachers! You guys were an awesome crowd and an obviously close family type faculty!



Review by Mickey B.

By Mickey B. on March 16, 2011

Marty provided a comedy show at our International meeting of Christian School educators. Was hilarious, good clean fun. We received excellent comments about his show and his ability to relate to the audience.

Hired as: Christian Comedian

Review by James N.

By James N. on March 16, 2011

Marty Simpson is hilarious! Watch some of his videos on Youtube, and you will agree with me!

Review by John C.

By John C. on January 18, 2011

We (Covert Homes) recently hired Marty to entertain a few hundred kids for us at our church camp, Salkahatchie. His stuff was hilarious!! These kids were laughing nonstop for an hour and a half. His goofy style of clean comedy is refreshing and our camp kids said it was the best entertainment we’ve ever had for them!!

John Covert
Owner Covert Homes
Director of 2010 Bythewood Salkahatchie

Hired as: Christian Comedian, Comedian, Comedy Show, Stand-Up Comedian

Review by Lacresha S.

By Lacresha S. on January 18, 2011

God bless you Marty. On behalf of Pastor and Bishop Haynes and the Last Day Family, we would like to say that we thank you and Ashley for coming out and helping us make this event so special and memorable for our Women of God. We pray God’s speed and blessing upon you and your family. Thank you again. We can’t wait for more fellowship. Send Ashley and the kids our love.

Hired as: Christian Comedian, Comedian, Comedy Show, Stand-Up Comedian

Booking Info

  • Typical Gig: 20 - 90 minutes
  • Fee: $2,000-$3,500
  • Languages: English


"You should expect a profound night of comedy. Marty is a master story-teller and fills all of his real life tales with an amazing amount of laughter along the way. When you look at Marty, there is nothing special about him. He's just an average, bald, middle-aged, white dude. But his ability to relate and inspire through is comedy is possibly unmatched in the "Clean" or "Christian" market and that's special indeed."

---- Marty's Best Friend from College Said This About Him ----

"You should expect to pay him on time."

----- Marty's Agent Said this ------


Marty Simpson is a happy husband, father, and comedian. He loves his wife and kids. He tells them before every athletic contest, "Remember, no matter what happens in the game tonight, Daddy loves you, win or tie."

Marty's "love language" is sarcasm.

He realizes that this one is not listed in Gary Chapman's book, "The Five Love Languages" but is confident it will be added to updated versions soon.

Marty's act is filled with actual events from his life. Everything he says is a true story based on something that either happened to him, his kids, or that he made up entirely. (Do we need to point out that this is sarcasm? Wow, even the parantheticals have sarcasm.) Let's talk about Marty!

Marty Simpson doesn’t look like an All-American Football Player, a sports radio talk show host, or a national touring comedian. Let’s be honest, he looks like Dr. Phil's heavier brother. But believe it or not, Marty was the first South Carolinian to be named a USA Today All-American Football Player. (**1)

He also doesn't look like he would have an amazingly beautiful wife which he's been happily married to for over 20 years, but that's true too! The rest of this bio may make it sound like Marty is a "super-macho" type whose comedy may only work for athletically minded folks, but that couldn't be further from the truth. Marty's comedy is rooted in his life experiences which include antics with his wife, children and golden doodles, as well as well as the occasional sports story. (But keep in mind, when Marty played football, he wasn't a real player, he was just the kicker!)

Let’s reminisce, shall we, about Marty’s glory days before he had kids and his hair fell out, which oddly enough, didn't happen in that order. In 1992, Marty was the leading scorer for the Gamecocks (**2) while maintaining a punting average of close to 40 yards.

Click here to see video of Marty’s 61 yard field goal and his other amazing plays while at Spring Valley High School and the University of South Carolina.

So after garnering all kinds of school, state, and NCAA records {Actually no NCAA records, but it just flowed better to write it that way} as a kicker for his high school and the South Carolina Gamecocks, Marty went on to teach drama and coach football at the high school level. Yes, you heard that correctly. Marty took his Theater degree from South Carolina and used it to take a high school football team all the way to the state championship in the fall, and then produced and directed Oscar Wilde's "The Importance of Being Earnest" to sell-out crowds that spring. Marty says, "Every fall, I just 'acted' like the football coach."

But enough about theater, let’s talk some more football. Statistically speaking, Marty was actually a pretty good football coach. Prior to becoming the head coach at Ben Lippen, the high school team had never had a winning record. But while Marty was a head coach, they made the play-offs on four different occasions and produced a winning record each season but one. Marty claims his losing season was his best coaching. He feels like the team had enough talent to go 1 and 10 and he took them to a 3 and 8 season. The players' parents of this team don't agree with Marty about this being his best year coaching, but that's because they can't fathom the truth about how awful at football their kids were.

Just for kicks, you can see a video of Marty's P.E. Trick Shots by clicking here. Or, if you’re tired of hearing about Marty, Marty, Marty... check out Samkon Gado: one of Marty's former players. Or if you aren't tired of hearing about Marty, you can check out a video of his coaching days here.

Marty garnered national recognition after becoming the winner of the 2012 Clean Comedy Challenge. Since that time, you may have seen Marty opening for Saturday Night Live's Dennis Miller (if you were at that one show, that one night), Tim Hawkins, Pauly Shore, and Last Comic Standing Winners, Jon Reep and John Heffron.

Today, Marty does indeed have that rare form of comedy that makes both young and old, tall and short.... laugh (although he does still have a hard time with Clemson fans). You can see Marty’s comedic production skills at work on a series of successful online videos including the “Domination” series about his beloved South Carolina Gamecocks or various other videos at his youtube channel.

Marty is also a popular radio guest on Sports Talk radio in the South Carolina area. He has co-hosted the formerly popular "Corey Miller Show" on 560 The Team in Columbia, as well as made dozens of appearances on 107.5 The Game.

Marty is also a featured columnist for the network and a very respected football analyst. His weekly "Big-Play Breakdown" articles for the South Carolina Gamecocks were wildly popular with more than just Gamecock fans. Here are a few examples: Article #1 and/or Article #2.

Marty also writes the occasional hard core journalism piece for the same network. And no matter what the Clemson message boards say about what a terrible journalist he is, or how little research he must do for his articles, these articles are rooted in 100% stone cold researched facts. They are in no way, shape or form intended to be satirical in anyway. Two of these articles are linked here: Non-Satire Article #1 and/or Non-Satire Article #2.

Marty stays busy at live standup shows throughout North America and has performed in venues from the Durham Performing Arts Center which held three thousand the night Marty performed there, to Atlanta's Uptown Comedy Corner, all the way to Los Angeles' Flappers Comedy Club. Marty's performance venues include clubs, churches, fund-raisers, festivals, corporate functions, and the occasional rock'n roll tour. Marty’s updates on Facebook, Twitter, and Youtube keep his fans and two or three of his friends laughing everyday. Follow him on twitter @MartySimpson.

**1. 1990 U.S.A. Today All-American - Marty wasn’t a real football player, he was just the kicker. But he was voted the best in the country in 1990 after setting the South Carolina state record with a 61 yard field goal and kicking the walk off winning field goal to win the Class AAAA Division 1 State Championship by a score of 3 to 0. See video of Marty's playing days.

**2. A Gamecock is a rooster that is known for its tenacity...seriously.

Past Booked Events

May 02, 2015 Wedding Reception

Influences & Inspiration

Jesus Christ, Bill Cosby, Mike Birbiglia, Brian Regan, Mitch Hedberg, Andy Griffeth, Carol Burnett, Lucille Ball

Setup Requirements

Mic Stand



Contact Marty Simpson

Get a Free Quote